Monday, October 29, 2012

Finally Germ Free?

The entire month of October has been a germ fest in our household. And I'm hoping to start November (and our anniversary) out right.

First I caught a cold. The worst of it was over by week 2. But as they all seem to do, it moved down to my chest so I had to put my C25K (more later) on hold for 2 weeks. Even after 2 weeks was up the congestion has lingered and while I am much improved I still have a bit of leftover.

Fortunately, neither Brandon or Madeline caught my cold as I took as many precautions as I could. But Madeline ended up catching what I think was a viral sore throat from her cousin. She had a fever with no other symptoms. I tried to look at her throat but getting a toddler to say, "Aaahhhhhh" is rather comical. From what I saw it looked a little red. Fortunately, it held off until the day after her birthday and after a miserable several days she was back to herself.

I called my prayer warriors into action asking for God to guard me from catching the virus. I still wasn't over my cold by then, my immune system is suppressed because of medication, and Madeline has a habit of stealing sips out of my water cup, which she did a few short hours before I realized she had a fever. So by all accounts, I should have caught it, but I didn't! Praise the Lord!!

Next, it was Brandon's turn. We aren't even sure if he caught what Madeline had or not. He ran a fever and was sick to his stomach, but his only lasted a day. Again, I took precautions and spent 3 nights sleeping on the couch or an air mattress in the other room. Not restful sleep in the least, but so far I am still symptom free.

And since, our anniversary is the end of this week, and we are actually taking a trip away just the two of us, I am being paranoid cautious and avoiding contact with any small children other than my own and any people who have been even the tiniest bit sick lately. For that reason (although I didn't tell J when she called late last week) I declined watching K this week and I'm glad I did, since they have all since come down with colds. We haven't really celebrated our anniversary in years and I'm really looking forward to a relaxing couple of days away. I really need it and our marriage really needs it.

So, we have a couple more days in October. I am preparing for and getting excited about our trip later this week. And I am praying for health in my household for the entire month of November.

Monday, October 15, 2012

Happy Birthday Madeline!!

Happy Birthday to my sweet, little girl! Today you are 2! How did the time go by so quickly? Sometimes it seems like only yesterday you were that small bundle who loved nothing more than to be rocked and held in Mommy's arms. Now you are an independent Miss, running from one thing to the next, hardly stopping to give Mommy a hug.

Some of the things you love: 

  • Your "friend" Violet. She goes just about everywhere with you, sometimes both small and large Violet.
  • Your books. Often times a stack of them have to go with us too. You even try to swipe them from other people's houses. Just about every morning you grab a stack, sit down, and "read" your way through all of them. You announce, "All done, the end!" when you finish one and then move to the read stack and move on to the next.
  • Wonder Pets. You recently discovered this show on Netflix. Up until that point you didn't really care for any TV show, you would never sit still and then you would find something else to amuse you. But not this show, that first time you sat mesmerized. And when I turned it off, did you ever protest. So it has become something of a treat and not an everyday thing.
  • Looking at pictures. You could sit for hours watching the slide show of pictures on the computer. You love to tell us who is in the pictures.
  • Dancing to music videos on Youtube. The Halloween light show set to Party Rock Anthem is your absolute favorite. We turn this on and you run around the room, squealing with joy as you attempt to dance and sing along. A new addition is Gangnam Style.
  • Being thrown up in the air. 
  • "Sigh" Your word for outside and your preferred "Sigh" activities are swimming and playing on the playground.

You are changing in other ways too:

  • You have gotten finicky about food. Some days you will eat everything we put in front of you, other days nothing will do. But you are learning the ways of our household. I make one meal for dinner, no special meals for picky little girls. If you don't eat dinner, you just make up for it the next day.
  • You are stubborn. I wonder where you get that trait from?
  • Communication. You speak many words clearly and you parrot nearly everything we say. But there is still much we don't understand so you let your frustration be known to all.
  • Tantrums. Oh, you will not like us one day for mentioning it but it is so hard not to laugh when you throw a tantrum for absolutely no reason. Lately, you will be happily standing with a stack of books and the next moment you throw them on the floor and then scream in frustration. If we could only know what is going on in your head at those moments? We've also caught you throwing yourself to the ground. The first time you did that you looked up in genuine surprise, who knew the hard floor hurt that much. Now, that makes it impossible for me to keep a straight face.
Oh, my dear, sweet Madeline, we love you so very much even when things aren't particularly easy. I hope you will always know that. Today we celebrate your life. We celebrate your triumphs, your failings, and your trying again. We celebrate everything that makes you, you!

Happy Birthday Madeline! May the Lord continue to bless you in the coming year as you grow in His grace.

Remembering Sarah

Today is a bittersweet day. Today is Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day. While we celebrate with great joy the birth of our sweet Madeline, I also remember our precious Sarah who we never got to meet here on earth.

It's a strange mix of emotions; missing our baby with sadness, but no longer the raw, deep anguish it once was. I guess wistfulness is closer. Sarah is in heaven, she knows the loving arms of her Father, she knows no earthly pain. So I rejoice that she is home. But it doesn't mean I don't wonder what she would look like now, what she would be interested in, what our lives might have been. I rejoice that one day I will be able to hold her in my arms.

I never knew October 15 was Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance until October 15, 2010. Early that morning Madeline entered the world and our hearts. A long awaited and much anticipated little miracle. Later that day, while on Hannah's Prayer, I found out and I struggled with the conflicting emotions. A day to remember my sweet child gone too soon, and yet a day of unspeakable joy that my daughter was laid in my arms.

So there is the bit of guilt that this is Madeline's day. A day to celebrate her birth and thank God for allowing us to raise his beautiful little girl. Does thinking of and remembering Sarah today somehow take away from that? I'm not sure. I will probably wrestle with these emotions for years to come.

But for now I will remember that small life that gave us hope after such disappointment even if we never got to meet her. And I celebrate with joy the sparkle of life that smiles at me every morning.

And I'm blessed to have a community of sisters who remember my sweet Sarah with me. I am grateful to Mandy, who in addition to lighting candles for her 4 heaven born children, lights a candle for my little Sarah and countless other children every year.